Thursday, June 24, 2010

Dad....




Ever since the fight....I've been ignoring my Dad.

My dad is the world to me...His thoughts are all I care to hear. And these last few months my dad has been telling me how much he loves me. And how I'm the best daughter. How I'm the only one who TRULY cares.
He even called me the day before the fight and confided in me about his problems and told me I was the one he could turn to.

I love him soo much. I tell him everything. Maybe not details of everything but I tell him the idea of it. Explain. Im...idk....doing stuff with boys. Id say dad I did some stuff with boys...and I wont do it again. Of which I haven't. He'd say okay hope. I love you.

See...when the fight really went bad..when things really got worse was when my sister told me exactly how my father felt about me and he told her this the day he called me and told me about his problems.
I lost it when she said he thought I was fake with him and to others. If anything I'm so real with others that that's why people dislike me cause I'll tell them like it is. If the sun is really fucking pink ill tell you its FUCKING PINK BITCH.

I just.....cant believe my dad...would think of me like that...after all the stuff hes said to me...and how he acts. it hurts so bad.

That's why I haven't called or gone over there yet...because I'm afraid its true...and if it is I don't know what I'll say or do....
I want it to be a lie. But I have a terrible feeling....its not.

and this makes me truly sad...and cry.

I thought i was better than that to him.. and he was better than that to me............

2 comments:

Anonymous said...

im not trying to pry here...but I have to say this....I dont have a relationship with my father....I live in the same house as him and we exchange maybe 4 words a week to one another...and sometimes...it breaks my heart....and if ever there was something that you could do for me....do this...go talk to your dad....nothing in the world is to broken to the point that you cant fix it....so fix it...

ps: I tell people how it is and alot of people dont like me because of that...so I know how you feel...truly

Hope said...

Katie- I love you so much girl. Your soo sweet.

And your not prying dont worry. ask what you will. its fine to me.
Im sorry that your father and you dont talk babe..i cant imagine that.

Im sorry.

I know you do.Thats why I love you soo much. cause you do say it like it is.

Love ya

Hope-